Mother’s Day – A day for celebrating or a day for regrets?

Most of us instantly see Mothers Day as a day for celebrating and thanking our mums for looking after us and doing the best they could for us during our lives.  However by definition the noun Mother is “a woman in relation to a child or children to whom she has given birth” and for some that has all it has been.  There has been no care given, no nurturing, no glimmer of affection.  For some it may be hard to believe that a woman who is capable of such a miracle as making a child could in anyway not give that child the basic of human expectations of nurture.  But that is the truth in some cases.   That is not to say that a Mother may not love her child in their own way.  However for whatever reason, most likely historical, she may not be able to nurture her child in the way that is perceived by most to be natural and beneficial.

Should we blame the mother? Some might!  The child might!  But I believe that people are not born cruel but sometimes something in their past may make them become so self absorbed that they do not know how to be a mother in the sense that most of us know it.

Is that wrong?  I would say that “what you don’t know, you don’t know”.  If you have never been shown how to be a good mother – how do you know how to be one.  If you add into that mix a good measure of hurt and that is all you have, that is all you will know how to give.

However sometimes children despite growing up the midst of all the pain, the indifference and the abuse,  grow up still loving their mothers but they are not available.  I would reason that most do, despite the difficult past and it is for them that we might need to share a thought that not all of us have mothers with which we can or wish to celebrate and be extra grateful that yours may be one that you can.